Some people are just a better match for us than others. When you’re around them do you feel content and accepted, or do you feel anxious and misunderstood? Sometimes our relationships can be a reflection of how we feel about ourselves, so be careful not to push your judgment of yourself onto your partner.ĭetermine whether these feelings arise out of their treatment of you, or whether they are insecurities you have no matter who you are with. How do you feel about yourself when you’re around them? So, whether you are in a relationship that you are unsure of right now or if you are just venturing into the dating world, ask yourself these things before you settle down. I stayed hoping some miracle of all miracles would happen, because I loved them and shouldn’t love be enough? I kept thinking if I gave more they would understand I was doing everything to make them happy, and in return they would want to make me happy. I kept thinking that if I were enough they would care more.
Not one of them treated me like I was the best thing since sliced bread. But not one of them really listened to me. I fell in love with these men because of who they were, not how they made me feel. They were flawed because I fell in love with character and not with our compatibility or their ability to contribute to my happiness. They weren’t flawed because I chose bad, evil men. Every relationship I’ve had was fatally flawed. It wasn’t only my ex-husband that I had this problem with. But I was in love, and shouldn’t that have been enough? He was not ready financially or emotionally. What was I thinking? We had nothing in common. Our souls connected immediately, and I fell in love with him. He was twelve years my junior, from another country (Greece), and barely spoke English.
The worst was when I fell in love with my ex-husband. I have felt this more times than I care to admit. Have you been in a relationship where you knew you weren’t really happy, but you kept saying, “But I love him/her. Have you ever thought that you could love someone enough to make everything work? “We accept the love we think we deserve.” ~Stephen Chbosky
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